My visit with mom was ok. If I didn't occupy her every minute, I would find her crying. I'm sure she sees me and wishes her perfect daughter didn't die, and what did she do to deserve this horrible thing happening to her.
I would find myself drifting when she would start telling me about how the devil gets into your head and puts bad thoughts into it. Then she would tell me that I don't understand. (because I believe that one's mind is making all of these worries. And who is she to say that to me? I have never spoken those words to my mom. Even when she doesn't have a notion about what I do or feel) So I was 13 again and getting a lecture about how I need to take my son to church and to talk to my other sister.
I just want to set the record straight and say I was not brought up with this crazy Fundamentalist Christian stuff. This has recently happened, especially with my mom. If my dad were alive, I'm sure it would be grounds for divorce. Seriously.
The little man made her laugh with crazy antics and all sorts of wacky stories.
I also carefully handpicked mom safe movie to keep her entertained. Spanglish, Connie and Carla, Bangor Sisters(I have secretly wanted to see this), and Failure to Launch.
No one died which was a big relief. And some made her laugh.
We went into the city one day and met Melvin for lunch at a cute diner. It was a nice warm day. Another relief.
She told me once she got home that she really did enjoy herself, even if it didn't seem like she did. I'm proud of her for saying that and grateful. She did seem unhappy. She's forever changed. And she has worried herself so much all of her life for something like this to happen. Not on a conscious level but really worried something tragic would happen to one of her girls, and it has.