08 August 2005

Reason: It could polish up the grey...

I really like to keep people guessing. It's a sad power play I know, but I'm a natural con artist. If you saw me on the street, you'd think I was just another ragged-out mom wrestling with her toddler. But no, I really have more going on upstairs than most people think.

My most recent incident occurred at the library. And now my cover of just being a mom is blown. Yes, being a mom, I am a true fan of having items placed on reserve. I no longer can peruse new fiction or DVD's. I have a 3 year old that only wants to go to the childrens section and play with a million puzzles. That is that.

Every once in awhile I stroll by the fiction section. Last week something caught my eye, the new Umberto Eco book. Ah Ha! (I know I am committed to finishing Of Human Bondage, but it is trying on my nerves. Just forget about the stupid waitress that thinks she's too good for you. She'll never change her mind.)

So I felt Eco was calling out my name. Took him over to the counter, and yes, I had some items on reserve. I thought I was going to escape out without comment. I was at the door and this particular librarian, who is by far, the only one at the library that is close to my age, said "I think you are the first person to check out Umberto Eco and Bubbleboy at the same time."

Stunned and well I don't think I turned red(being a con and all) I told him I have various interests. He laughed and said "I guess so"

I know I'm leaving this wide open for comments about "Bubbleboy". I know, I know. It was cute and well there were many similarities to Pee Wee's Big Adventure.

I should just wear a t-shirt saying I Heart Jake Gyllenhaal, and be done with it and move on. That and never go to my local library branch ever again.


Willowsss said...

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acumamakiki said...

I always wonder about what the librarian or others think of me, the mama, as opposed to other times when I'm sans my girl and just me.

I actually like to mix it up as you do. I don't like being easily figured out and I like being many different things.

I think that's why I was compelled to re-pierce my nose after it was closed a very long time. So I wasn't like every other mother on the playground.

laurenbove said...

Hey PG: IDB to say HEy.

marybishop said...

I once checked out The Cake Bible and The Biography of the Marquis de Sade at the same time- cake bible book on top.

The librarian looked shocked when he picked up de Sade's bio, eyebrows raised into his hairline. I said: look you own the book, I'm only borrowing it..and we both laughed like hell.

(His laugh was silent but a lot of shoulder movement was going on..)

Vajana said...

marybishop: what a great comment! I love it!

I have 'accidentally' let my library card run out as it is almost $100 for me to get it (living out of district sadly) I miss going there once a week with the kids. I'm a bad, bad mom.

I did finally buy the "Time Traveler's Wife" at Target the other day and have started it!

Bubble Boy is cute.

I always think of those Law and Orders when they always go to the library to find out what kinds of books the suspect has checked out. So now you've thrown them off your path!!! :)

Jeffs place said...

The stories the librarians could tell.....
MBs comment about had me spewing mountain dew out the nose today!

paintergirl said...

Hey to all my peeps and NOT the blog junk mail!! I'm in the midst of doing a little side job which it's always nice to have moola. So sorry about the delay in my replies.

acumamakiki-I think we are on the same wavelength sister. Always march to the beat of a different drummer right?

LN-Hey mamacita! You are always loved over here!

MB-I want to know what the cake bible is? I mean I know all about crazy de Sade and all(I think we have 120 Days somewhere in the attic, mutating)
I wish I could have been the librarian. You have me cracking up at the thought of that "check out"-oh especially since you live in Connecticut.

vajana-That's so sad about your card. Maybe with your new job you'll be in the district and you can use your work address. (Yes I am evil) I would so miss my library fixes.
I hope you like Time Travelor. Tell me what you think of it. We just rented Donnie Darko and that has time travel in it too. (Hence my new Jake thing) I think I'll be over Jake soon and just look into time traveling. I need to make better use of my time! Bubble Boy was very cute.

Jeff-No more spewing. I'm running low on paper towels over here! We need Sylow to tell us some more library stories.

echrai said...

I understand completely. It's sort of fun to break down people's mental barriers and assumptions of what people are like. I'm a law student and work during the day in a legal environment. I dress appropriately, I have no extra holes in my body or tattoos or dyed hair or anything that would scream "I'm a fantasy freak" and yet, my boyfriend and some of our friends regularly get together (with their children) to play dungeons and dragons. Horrors! How could any professional want to play such a devil-worshipping (imaginative), unrealistic (fantastic) game? Only druggies who escape reality play that! I always find it fun to stop into the comic book stores in full professional garb. ;)

Sylow_P said...

Oh the horror, the pure horror.

First off, it's against the law for a cop to try and demand library records without a court order. The 'patriot' act made it less difficult, but librarians across the country have routinely been telling FBI agents to piss off when they try to do it without a court order. Reading a biography of osama bin laden does not make you a card carrying member of al queda.

Second, your librarian broke rule number one. Never do anything to make the patron feel uncomfortable.

If you want to check out some porn, he should ask what you're into so he can recommend the best stuff.

paintergirl said...

echrai-You are the COOLEST lawyer ever. What type of lawyer are you and will I be able to have you on retainer and sy take you cross country to Vegas?
I would love to see the faces of people in the comic book store when you walk in with your power suit on. Very cool.

Sylow-there are rules?! Wow and this particular librarian has it out for me in the first place. Never, ever will this man smile at me(and I can make anyone smile-trust me), except of course when I check out Bubble Boy. Jeesh!

I admire librarians for their reactions against the patriot act.
Piss off! Exactly!

Oh and the whole porn thing...if I checked out some Ann Rampling, I'm afraid I might be referenced to "Hunting and Fishing Magazines" in my neck of the woods.

Rose said...

Who can blame you for watching Bubbleboy just for seeing Jake Gyllenhaal. I think I got out something called the Moonlight Mile for the same reason. Did you watch the Director's Cut of Donnie Darko? It's quite different to the original and shows bits of the time travel book. Like your blog... I checked it out after you left a comment on my boyfriend's blog.

paintergirl said...

Hey Rose. i'm so happy you stopped by. I loved all the artwork on your boyfriend's site. Oh "Moonlight Mile", that was a sweet movie. The soundtrack was terrific. Makes you want to break out The Stones records. We just saw the first "Donnie Darko" so I know it will be awhile until we see the directors cut.(the Jake fervor will have to die down first) Darko was pretty great though. I love to see teenage movies that go beyond the general topics.

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